Recommitted...

Sometimes these two little people make me crazy.

The never-ending chase, the sibling squabbles, the skipped naps, the daily destruction zone -- all can be downright exhausting.

It's so easy, natural even, to focus on the things that make motherhood hard.

At least for me.

But today is the day I put a stop to that tendency.

It's time to remember that though there are certainly crazy days -- days filled with frustration and hair pulling and even sometimes tears -- not a moment passes in which I am not crazy about my children.

My Lola and my James -- my greatest gifts, my most cherished creations, my whole life.

 

Tonight, Reece and I went through our bedtime routine with our babies -- bath, lotion, pjs, stories, songs, prayers, smooches, stalling (Lola) and finally, sleep.

 

And we couldn't help but hold each other as we shed more than a few tears, thinking of the dozens of parents in Connecticut who won't get to tuck their babies in tonight.

My heart is absolutely broken.

I'm sad.

I'm scared.

I'm angry.

I'm in a state of utter disbelief.

But I'm so grateful that my sweet children are sleeping in their beds, safe, at least for tonight, from the evils and pains of the world.

Today I recommit to falling in love with motherhood all over again, to focusing on the things that make it so beautiful and rewarding and sacred.

Now excuse me as I go peek in on my sleeping babes.

It's going to take every ounce of restraint in my body not to pick them up and squeeze them.