James + Reece + Lola + Jessica

James + Reece + Lola + Jessica

Friday, April 8, 2011


The weather here has been positively mad over the past few days.
Yesterday brought a thunder and lightning storm that shook the entire neighborhood, followed by a white-out blizzard that made it impossible for one to even consider unbolting the front door.
Today, it's raining and snowing at the same time.  Go figure.
Thank heavens for "Gone With the Wind" and a hot mug of Pero with Irish Creme.

Lately, I find it difficult to breathe.
Maybe it's the stress of moving.
Of the thought of leaving the life we've come to love in exchange for a new one.
Most likely it's the little person growing inside me, picking a fight with my lungs over space.
Probably all of the above.
But it makes sleep difficult and panic ever-present.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm not very nice when I'm pregnant.
Inhibition is lost, and I find myself saying and doing things I'd never say or do otherwise.
Pregnancy makes me bolder, and that's not necessarily a good thing.
So, to those who've fallen victim to my recent lack of patience and tact (cough, Reece), I beg forgiveness.

I'm 99 percent sure I'm not going to work anymore after the second baby comes.
My feelings on the topic are frustratingly mixed.
I love working.  I started my first non-babysitting job at the age of 14 and haven't stopped working since.
I find my current job exciting, frustrating, rewarding, exhilarating, exhausting, challenging and wonderful -- all at the same time.
Funny how the same adjectives apply to motherhood -- yet in a much more intense and meaningful way.
And though it's been difficult, I've reached the conclusion that being with my children is what will most help me to grow, learn and ultimately reach my full potential.
That being said, my farewell to the newsroom will be a painfully difficult one.

This is why rainy/snowy days are dangerous.
They make me think.


AJ and Cindy said...

boy, there are so many new changes coming up! I know you will handle everything with wonderful grace, especially being a mommy to two! You will excel at whatever path comes your way and I am excited to watch and to continue to look up to you!

Cindy said...

I'm going to be quiting my job soon too and I'm not sure what to think. I don't know if I'm happy or sad ... we'll see.

mathistown said...

Isn't this weather the worst? Too much yucky, not enough delightful sunshine! Where do I lodge a complaint... ;)