James + Reece + Lola + Jessica

James + Reece + Lola + Jessica

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Fall Forward...

Lola, Grandma and I were enjoying a walk around the neighborhood the other day when we happened to stroll past the local elementary school.

It must have been the first day of school, because for the first time in several months the parking lot was alive with people. Small children struggled with their giant backpacks while trying to juggle their lunchboxes AND their parents' hands. Some looked terrified, while others looked ready to take on the world.

In some ways, I can't wait to hold Lola's hand and lead her into her first classroom. I'll make sure to let her pick out the perfect backpack (just as long as it doesn't say Hannah Montana on it). I'll let her choose what she wants to find when she opens her lunchbox (though I'm starting to understand why Mom banned the Lunchables. Rubber meat and cheese that smells like feet? No thanks). I'll pull her hair into the perfect ponytail so it doesn't get in her face during recess.

I'm sure I'll cry. A lot.

Will she make friends?
Will she be scared?
Will she like her teacher?
Will she have people to play with and sit with and laugh with?

For now, I will put those concerns to rest and just enjoy my newborn. She's sweet, she's fun to look at and she has very basic needs. Right now, I can protect her from nearly everything.

Besides, her ever-present "paci" prevents her from giving me lip.

*Unfortunately, she's already mastered the stink eye...


Jordan Ormond said...

You gave in and let her have the paci ... rather she's learned the difference between the paci and the food source! Yay! That thing is a lifesaver sometimes!

The Acerson Family said...

Even after six children, the youngest being in 8th grade, I still have a hard time letting them go each fall. But then you just find yourself at the school helping (and watching and making friends yourself) and it eases the anxiety a bit. But your list of hopes and fears made me cry a bit this morning because that's how you always feel--no matter how old they are. I just try to make them see how hard it is for others to be without friends and encourage them to watch out for others. I think it helps.

However, I don't cry much at the beginning of school anymore. I cry at the end of the school year when it's over. Not because I don't want them home for the summer -- but because they will "never pass this way again." They have no idea that they are leaving just a little more of their childhood behind each year.

There is a book you MUST read. It's about trying to remember their "lasts" as well as you do their "firsts." It makes you appreciate every stage of their little life. Every moment.

We older moms tell you younger moms to cherish them while they are young. I remember being told the same thing when I was a young mother. I remember thinking, "Really? This is exhausting! I can't wait until they can do such and such for themselves!" or when they can sleep through the night, or a million other things. But it goes so very fast and soon they will be sitting on your lap -- all 100 pounds of arms and legs and not very comfortably, at that, and you still love it because you know that soon they will no longer want to sit on your lap at all.

All my love, Jessica. You are a wonderful mother. Thanks for making me cry and think a little this morning about the most important "calling" a woman can have.

Logical Libby said...

I can't even imagine how I am going to make it through Meg's junior high years. I think I will have to be sedated the whole time...