Dear fellow passenger...

I get it, you have big biceps.

But guess what?  When you're pregnant and stuck on the last row of a SkyWest commuter plane, being shoved against the window by some guy who is clearly WAY too into protein shakes makes an hour-long flight seem much, much longer.

I'm not impressed by your constant flexing, though it appears you certainly are.

I am not interested in feeling said biceps -- one because I'm a married woman and two because they are freaky like Madonna's -- so kindly stop forcing your elbow into my lap.

Also, refusing to turn off your stupid iPad when the flight attendant asks you to do so just makes you look like a douche.

And finally, I think that shirt you were wearing in what I can only guess was an effort to accentuate your man cleavage could probably fit my 20-month-old daughter.  Stop shopping in the kids' section.  Just stop.

Best regards,

Your grumpy, hot, cramped, disgruntled, irritated and very pregnant seatmate