James + Reece + Lola + Jessica

James + Reece + Lola + Jessica

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Four Months...

My Lola girl is four months old today.

She's tangibly been in our lives for just over 17 weeks now.

17 weeks.

Today was a rough one for my girl. She cried and cried and cried, for no apparent reason. I scooped her up in my arms and rocked her, kissed her, whispered to her and sang to her. As the screams died down and the heartbreaking little sniffles set in, she buried her little head into my neck, glanced up at me with those big brown eyes and never looked away.

It's moments like that one that make motherhood so incredible.

It's really impossible to describe how much this little person means to me. Over the past four months I've realized that nothing, and I mean nothing is even remotely as important to me as my daughter.

I used to think I wanted a big career that came along with a big salary and a big city. I used to think that I would somehow squeeze a kid or two into the picture, eventually. I used to think that time wouldn't come until I had accomplished all my professional goals.

And then I got pregnant. 41 weeks and a day later, I gave birth. In the moment that I held my baby for the first time, I realized this was truly the only thing of significance I had ever done in my entire life.

My own Mama put it best: Lola is like magic. Stress, sorry, anguish, worry, anxiety -- just holding her makes it all go away.

Each day brings a new delight (and sometimes a new challenge). She's chatting, laughing, grabbing things, kicking, bouncing and nearly sitting up on her own. She's also reached record pitches with that scream of hers.

I wonder if I will ever tire of watching her. She amazes me. And the fact that I created her? Well, I don't know that I will ever fully grasp that one.

So happy four months, Lola girl. Your Mama is so in love with you, it's almost unhealthy.

(Pictures to come. Blogger will not let me upload anything tonight, and I'm getting mad enough to chuck my laptop against the wall. It's time to go to bed)


Candace said...

Oh congrats Jess! She is such a little cutie, and I just love hearing all about her. And 4 months already? How did that happen so fast? Geesh.

Abby said...

Lola for president.