Hungry? Why Wait...

(Disclaimer: this is NOT, I repeat, NOT an April Fools joke)

Yesterday I came home with a large load of groceries. Transporting anything from the car up to our second floor apartment has become somewhat of a struggle, what with the growing belly throwing my balance for a loop. But alas, I somehow managed to lug all 10 bags up the stairs and into the apartment, while Reece held the cats at bay.

After dumping the bags on the floor, I made my way to the kitchen for a celebratory glass of cranberry juice. Reece helped me unload, and all was right with the world (and our pantry).

Until we heard a rustling sound.



You may remember (from previous posts) this little one's pension for eating almost everything. She was, after all, a street cat. It's not uncommon to find her pulling all varieties of discarded peels, cores, crusts and shavings from the garbage disposal. She'll steal a cookie right out of your mouth (as my sister learned the hard way). And she's proven her ability to chew through plastic, after devouring three loaves of banana bread at Christmas time.

Having clarified her bizarre, yet voracious appetite, I return to my story.

Reece went into the living room to check out the situation, and I knew it was bad when he let out a near bloodcurdling scream. I ran in to find a massacre of the utmost degree.

You know those massive bags of Malt O' Meal cereal? The ones that weigh about 20 pounds? Well, Reece takes his Marshmallow Matey's pretty seriously, and apparently so does Adele.

A bag had been left unattended by the door. In it, was a massive bag of Marshmallow Matey's. Or what used to be a bag. After chewing solidly on each end, the cat decided to use the claws God blessed her with to slash the entire thing open from one end to the other. And of course, her animal instinct kicked in, so she had to feast on her prey.

Reece almost died.

And so did I. From laughter.

*I realize this post would be a lot funnier with a picture, but unfortunately Reece was too traumatized to let me snap one. Nothing gets between my man and his Marshmallow Matey's.